Tag Archives: Running Fit Events

Scrumpy Skedaddle Recap: The V.I.P. “Inside” Report

Last Sunday was the second annual Scrumpy Skedaddle at Almar Orchards. Hard to believe it’s been a year since the notorious happenings of 2014! But there I was, with a couple thousand of my best friends, lining up for a sprint through the orchard on a brisk fall day. Overcast and drizzly? Who cared? This was gonna be fun!

Scrumpy - 10K Run

The 10K takes over the orchard.

Last year’s Skedaddle, as has been related on this blog, had issues with long lines for the porta-potties and the cider and pancakes after the race. I’m happy to report there were big improvements this year, with shorter lines, a much better course layout, and the addition of the 10K and the two-race “Cider Slam” – which, of course, I just had to do. Along with Run Woodstock, the Skedaddle is becoming one of my favorite events – and you all know I’ve run a lot of events.

The 5K and 10K both started out on dirt roads, then into the orchard on wide grassy strips between rows of apple trees. It gave the run a feeling of intimacy, even of exclusiveness, despite the large number of runners. It had the best features of a trail run without the hazards of rocks and roots.

Scrumpy - Running in the Orchard 2

The Head Goat (orange jacket) directs traffic.

Randy of Running Fit Events (orange jacket), a.k.a. “The Head Goat”, directs traffic.

I ran the 5K hard – not my best time, but solid. And the top four age 50-59 runners (which included me) beat all but one of the 40-49 group. We rock! Then I ran the 10K easy, which is why you see these photos of the course. What a contrast! Instead of focusing on my breathing and pace, I could relax and take in the scene around me, just running for the fun of it.

2015 Scrumpy - Post-race Cider

I could have done this all afternoon.

Like last year, the post-race food was excellent. They moved the pancake production outside, with two lines, so everything flowed smoothly. The live band was a nice touch, too. And the hard cider on tap was amazing; not too sweet, with just a touch of tartness from the mild fermentation. Scrumpy in the bottle is good, but this is unbelievably good. And they do it just for this event.

Can I have one of these installed in my man cave, please?

Could I have one of these installed in my man cave, please?

And finally, what I know you’ve all been waiting for: what was the VIP potty like? Well, here you go!

The outside.

The outside.

The magic pass that got you in the short line!

The magic pass that got you in the short line!

Happy passholders. (And note the guy on the far right who'd like to know why he's in the LONG lines.

Happy passholders. (And note the guy on the far right who’s not too happy about being in the LONG lines. Hey, it’s all about who you know, fella!)

And as a special bonus, exclusively for my readers: the INSIDE VIEW!

VIP Potty - inside

Loaded with amenities.

Reading material!

Reading material!

Specially printed toilet paper!

Specially printed toilet paper!

Will I be back for 2016? You bet, VIP or not. And you all should come along. Even if you’re not a dedicated runner, you’ll have a good time. It’s a cider mill, after all. How could you not have a good time? See you there!

A V.I.P. What? You’re Sh**ting Me

IT ALL STARTED WHEN I broke one of my cardinal rules on race day. And now just look where it’s taken me. I suppose I should be honored to receive a V.I.P. of anything. But this? Well, read on and judge for yourself.

Scrumpy Bottle with Finishers MugThe Scrumpy Skeddadle is the final event of the Thirsty Three, a set of Running Fit Events races linked with certain beverages. “Scrumpy” is a Scottish term for hard cider, and Almar Orchards makes a brand of cider known as J. K. Scrumpy’s. The first-ever Skeddadle took place at the Almar Orchards cider mill in October, 2014, and there I took the fateful steps toward what is possibly a first-ever event in running.

The trigger was my decision to have a cup of coffee on race morning. I never do this because it has digestive consequences that would be very inconvenient during a run. But the Scrumpy began at 10:00 a.m. and I was up before 7:00, so I figured I was safe.

But as I drove to the orchard in Flushing (*) I began to feel the need, so to speak. By the time I parked, the need was becoming urgent. I went into the store and headed for the bathrooms. Locked. Due to the large crowds, I suppose, everyone had to use the porta-potties. And with over 2,200 people there, the lines were long.

This is from Hightail to Ale, but you get the idea.

This is from Hightail to Ale. Scrumpy’s lines were, shall we say, a bit longer.

You can read more about what happened here, in last year’s post on the subject. All I will say here is that I was not in my happy place, and I took it out on the poor longsuffering race staff. Turned out I was not the only one with this complaint (**) but perhaps I was the only one to hear about it later from the poor longsuffering race staff.

Determined to make amends, I delivered some flowers to them after the race with a vase of my own design:

Flowers in Porta Potty Vase

I wrote on the card, “The next time people give you sh**, you can put it in this.”

The RF Events folks had a good laugh and posted it on their Facebook page. I figured that was the end of it, so to speak, although someone made an off-the-cuff comment that they oughta create an official porta-potty for me at some future race.

Fast forward to Run Woodstock two weeks ago. I was standing around waiting for the 100K race to start when Mandy, one of the RF Events staff, came up to me.

“I have some exciting news for you,” she said. “Do you want to hear it now, or after the race?”

“Oh, tell me now,” I said, not knowing what condition I’d be in fourteen hours later.

And she told me. And here it is:

The RunBikeThrow VIP Porta-Potty

Yes, the off-the-cuff remark actually came to pass. And my lucky readers can be a part of it!

Anyone reading this post who’s going to the 2015 Scrumpy on October 4 can share with me the exclusive right to use my V.I.P. facility. Just sign up for the race (5K or 10K), then email me at jeff(at)runbikethrow.net and ask for a pass. I have a limited number, so it’s first come, first serve.

I ask nothing in return. However, if you do get a pass, I would love it if you would consider making a donation to any Humane Society.

Here are some other good reasons to run the Scrumpy Skeddadle:

Scrumpy Skeddale Bottle Opener Finishers Medal* You get a finisher’s mug and it will be filled with hard cider on draft. And if you buy some of their bottled cider, you can use your finisher’s medal to open it!

* You get a pancake breakfast catered by Chris Cakes of Michigan. They’re known for flipping the pancakes onto your plate from several feet away. Worth it for the entertainment alone!

* The energy and excitement of a morning at the cider mill.

* Fresh air and exercise, and a fun run through their orchard. You can run the 5K, 10K, or, if you’re feeling up to it, run both and get a “Cider Slam” award.

Hope to see you there! If not, fear not – I will take plenty of photos. (From the outside.)

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(*) No, the irony was not lost on me.

(**) Pun intended, of course. They always are.

How Runners Have Fun

WARNING: This post contains material of an “adult” nature. If it offends your sensibilities in any way, then I’ve done my job. And thanks for reading.

YOU NON-RUNNERS OUT THERE may wonder what runners do for fun. Well, the first answer of any runner would be, “running, of course.”  But contrary to what you may believe, we do know how to throw a party.

Me Playing Disc GolfHow good a party? Let me ask you this: at what kind of party can one have the opportunity to taste wine, drink a shot, sit in a Corvette, swim fully clothed, play disc golf, eat ice cream, and (gasp!) bare it all – while running? The answer is the Running Fit Events Dash and Burn Soiree, which took place Thursday night at a secret location near Northville.

The D&B is the annual “thank you” party for event volunteers, so only volunteers get invited. (See the end of this post for how to get involved.)  It’s low-key but a lot of fun. And this year the Events staff spiced up the pre-party run by adding a scavenger hunt. The mission was to locate area landmarks and/or perform certain activities, and Instagram photos back to the staff. As I (very happily) don’t own a smartphone, I brought along my daughter Rachel, who lent her social media expertise to the effort.

We teamed up with two nice ladies (Jen and Kelly), and were handed a hand drawn map of the Northville area and a checklist of things to find or do (including, yes, a “run naked” item). At 6:00 we were sent off. We had until 7:15 to return and hand in our checklist, along with the photos of items completed.

I believe this "half price for men" is grounds for gender discrimination.

I believe this “half price for men” is grounds for gender discrimination.

Some items were easy, such as climbing a tree or doing sit-ups. Others required exploring the Northville area – on foot, of course. Unfortunately, Kelly was injured and had to drop out, so our team of three hotfootted into town. Jen’s knowledge of the area proved incredibly valuable as we went through the list. Here’s a sampling of the things we were able to accomplish in 75 minutes.

Rachel scores big for our team!

Rachel scores big for our team!

Runners are very sophisticated drinkers.

Runners are very sophisticated drinkers.

The church people hoped we'd win. I didn't tell them what I thought we needed to do to win.

The church people hoped we’d win. (I didn’t tell them what I thought we needed to do to win.)

Lucky break: finding a real horse in the Northville Downs parking lot.

Lucky break: finding a real horse (big bonus) in the Northville Downs parking lot.

One downer in an otherwise great hunt: the Corvette owner rudely denied our request to sit in his car. And he worked in a sewing shop! Well, we know where we’re never going to buy embroidery supplies.

So – if you’ve gotten this far, I bet it’s because you want to know if people really ran naked. (That’s okay – I’d do the same). So here you go.

The “run naked” item was 250 points, and I felt that just might win it for us. So with Rachel out of earshot, I told Jen I would “take one for the team” when we got back to the party site. She was surprised but didn’t object, so I sprinted to the finish table and asked if there was time. But the clock was just past 7:15. Darn!

During dinner I moped a bit because of the missed chance. And the scuttlebutt (so to speak) was that at least one other team had done it. So I wasn’t expecting much when Randy stepped to the mike to announce the results.

“Wow,” he said. “This team really did all that stuff? The winning team, with 2,275 points. Jeff, Jen, and Rachel, come on up here!” We’d won it after all, and I hadn’t had to strip off. Just as well – I’m sure it saved at least one camera from exploding, not to mention my daughter’s head.

Jen on my left, Rachel on my right.

Me with race bag, Jen with camp chair and Rachel with her well-earned blanket.

Our prize was first crack at the swag table, piled high with shirts, mugs, and other race prize paraphernalia. I spied a Dances with Dirt gym bag – perfect as a drop bag for trail ultras. Mine!

And I got one more unexpected shout-out for my “Most Valuable Runner” performance in 2014, when I ran all 24 Running Fit races. Good grief. What am I going to do for an encore?

Actually, I got a possible answer to that the next day, when a friend of mine who lives in Portland helpfully told me about this:

World Naked Bike Ride website

It’s too late for this year, but in 2016? Do I dare? If I do, my devoted readers will be the first to know. Can’t promise any photos, though.

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Want to join the party next year? Volunteer for a Running Fit event – which you can do at an event’s website. (Click here for the 2015 race calendar.) In addition to a $30 credit for a race entry, you get on the “A list” for the D&B. Such a deal! And you don’t have to be a runner to volunteer, although it would help to study the language. (For example, “fartlek” is not an obscenity.)

What Would You Trade the Rest of Your Life For?

During a recent run, I was told that a number of world-class athletes had once been asked the following: Suppose there was a drug that would guarantee victories in whatever events you chose, but would also cause you to die in five years. Would you take that drug?

The surprising result became known as Goldman’s dilemma, after the physician who posed the question. Read on for how the athletes answered.

Hey, what if I could take the drug at age 95? By Kuebi = Armin Kübelbeck (Own work) [GFDL or CC BY-SA 3.0], via Wikimedia Commons

Hey, what if I could take the drug at age 95?
Source: Armin Kübelbeck, Wikimedia Commons

One could argue that the question is meaningless, because in reality there is no such drug, and therefore no actual choice to make. Yet isn’t a form of Goldman’s dilemma already in evidence from athletes who take steroids and other performance-enhancing drugs, despite the known side effects and risk of getting caught?

And what about NFL players who continue to play despite multiple surgeries, tissue-destroying cortisone shots, and concussions? Many former players are practically crippled or have symptoms of severe brain damage from concussions.

When I was growing up, I was taught that delayed gratification was a good thing. And anyone who works out has heard the phrase short-term pain for long-term gain. But the examples above are doing the opposite – obtaining short-term money and fame in exchange for long-term suffering. This is classically portrayed as selling one’s soul to the Devil.

And over half the athletes asked the “magic drug + death” question said they would take it, willing to take the short-term success in exchange for no long-term at all.

And this disgraced former champion even said he'd cheat all over again. "Lance Armstrong MidiLibre 2002" by de:Benutzer:Hase - Self-photographed. Licensed under CC BY-SA 3.0 via Wikimedia Commons.

And this disgraced former champion recently said he’d cheat all over again.
Lance Armstrong MidiLibre 2002” by de:Benutzer:HaseSelf-photographed. Licensed under CC BY-SA 3.0 via Wikimedia Commons.

I bring this up due to something Randy Step recently posted in the Running Fit Events newsletter. He cited the recent sensationalist articles claiming that running hard is as bad for you as being sedentary, and that life is not prolonged as a result (read a more informed analysis here). Randy’s point is that we don’t run to escape death; we run to enjoy the experience and experience a higher quality of life until we do shuffle off this mortal coil.

“Would you rather be living it up and running every day until you are 80 and then just drop dead,” Randy writes, “or would you rather live a sedentary life, develop congestive heart failure at 80, spend 10 years in a nursing home with multiple disease factors, perhaps Alzheimer’s and no quality of life, then die at 90?”

Fortunately, studies consistently show that people who exercise live longer and also have a higher quality of life than those who are sedentary, so again this is a hypothetical choice. But I’m pretty sure I’d choose the “run every day, die at 80” scenario. Being active is about more than just staying healthy and fit. I believe it is a major contributor to my self-confidence and happiness.

Somehow I don't think Meb is interested in dying early. By Gr5 (Own work) [CC BY-SA 3.0], via Wikimedia Commons

Here’s a hard runner who I’ll bet outlives any couch potato.
By Gr5 (Own work) [CC BY-SA 3.0], via Wikimedia Commons

As for dropping dead during a run, there have been races where I’ve felt pretty close to it. So far, so good, though. I’ll be sure to let you all know if I make it to 81.